Healthy Mind, Healthy Eating

Infants are naturally good eaters. They fuss when they're hungry, eat heartily until they feel satisfied, and then they stop eating. Why, then, are food issues and eating disorders on the rise? Why don't the natural eating habits of the infant last? What goes wrong?

The answer is that many things can go wrong. However, as parents, we have an integral part in helping our children develop healthy ideas about eating that can compliment their natural instincts and deter dangerous eating habits later on.

Let's look at the influences that shift our children away from healthy eating. The first is the media. ANAB (Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia Association) says the media "promises women with low weights and svelte shapes will be happier, more sophisticated, better at their careers ... obesity is considered intolerable. Chubby children are seen by their peers and others to be lazy, less intelligent, dishonest and sloppy." Parents as well as children are influenced by this widespread message, and parents often obsess about their children's eating habits and weight because of the media's "promise."

Negative parental influence begins simply enough, and is often carried out with the highest of motives. Parents want their children to eat well-balanced meals and to be an appropriate weight. The tactics parents use, however, are misguided and often have the opposite of the desired effect.

Take "Nancy" for example, whose son "Joshua" was on the thin side. Nancy's pediatrician advised that he be given more calories, and Nancy began to plead "one more bite, just one more bite for me" and to engage in bitter power struggles over food at every meal. As a result, Josh refused to eat at all for many meals, and his weight dropped dangerously low.

Or look at "Harvey" who took his pediatrician's advice that his daughter was a "few pounds overweight". When she said she was hungry, he'd give her carrot sticks, ignoring her pleas for pasta or bread. He eliminated dessert and fed her small portions at each meal, even when she said she was still hungry. Much to her father's surprise, she began to gain even more weight and one day he discovered the reason why: she'd been sneaking food into her bedroom and eating without him knowing.

The tactics these parents used serve to disconnect the natural feelings of hunger and fullness that their children instinctively experience and to lay the foundation for eating issues. As you begin to assess whether you are disconnecting your child from her internal feedback system, ask yourself these questions, taken from "Let Them Eat Cake" by Ronald E. Kleinman, MD and Michael S. Jellinek, MD. Do you:

* Have a preoccupation with your child's diet? Do you argue with your child about his food or snacks or discuss his food choices in an attempt to pressure him into eating certain foods over other foods?

* Have a preoccupation with your own diet or exercise regimen?

* Play food games or engage in bribing your child with food? Do you withhold dessert until other foods are eaten?

* Have rigid